Chapter 23

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*woooah, drastic POV change! I decided to write some of this from Caspars POV cause I love him too. Enjoy!*

Caspar's POV

I can't stand this. Joe didn't tell me they were coming... More importantly that SHE was coming.

I grip my hair in my hands in frustration as I feel tears well up in my eyes. Always Zalfie this, Zalfie that. The internet is so obsessed with the two of them, they're all so convinced that their love is eternal.

But oh god does it hurt when I see her with him. Alfie is my mate, but he's with her. Zoe, I've always been attracted to her. Her and I can laugh together like no one else, she is beautiful, smart, sophisticated and just nice.

I remember when I arrived back home a few hours ago, still terribly hungover from the night before. I had stumbled into the apartment, smelling and looking like shit. And I had stumbled in on them, snuggling on the couch, kissing. I almost felt like throwing up then and there.

I'm now outside Eila's door, contemplating whether or not to ring her doorbell. I made some whacked up excuse about "needing some air" and rushed over here. I couldn't stand to be around them any longer.

I remember the way Zoe looked at me when I came home - it was almost a look of sympathy. She probably knows I have this infatuation for her, even if it's completely irrational.

Zalfie is just too goddamn strong, apparently.

Before I can put it off any longer, I ring the doorbell. The minute I do it I regret it - what if Joe's in there with her? What if they're having sex? Oh god, Caspar don't think that... They're not like that yet, I don't think...

I'm this close to walking away, but it's suddenly too late as Eila opens the door. When she sees me her eyebrows raise in surprise - she obviously wasn't expecting this.

She looks even more surprised as she takes in my appearence. Fuck, she can obviously tell I've been crying as her eyes widen when she looks at me.

"Cas... Are you ok?" She asks, concern lacing her voice. I'm glad I came to see her - she's a good friend, always so caring and understanding.

I sigh and shake my head, staring at the floor. I feel her hand grip my arm and pull me inside out of the empty hallway.

Eila's POV

As I lead Caspar into the lounge my thoughts are whirling. What the hell has happened now? I honestly have no clue what Caspar is upset about, so I sit him down on a dining room chair.

"Cas what's wrong?" I ask him. He's still staring at the ground, looking like he's holding back tears. I don't want to push him but I need to know why he's upset. I'm speaking softly so I don't wake Joe up.

"It's... Zoe." He says it so simply, however his voice cracks slightly on the last syllable. Suddenly I understand everything, and I drape my arm around Caspar to comfort him.

"I thought you just had a crush..." I speculate quietly while rubbing his arm.

"So did I. But I've been in denial - the whole time it was more than that. No matter how much I convince myself it will never happen, I still stay hopeful. And today just crushed that hope." His head is hanging and I feel so much empathy for him - I know how it feels to want someone you can never have. It happened to me a few times during high school, before I blossomed and before guys noticed me.

"What happened?" I ask.

"I just walked in on them kissing when I got home. I was still hungover and in a vulnerable state... I think it all just hit me then, when I saw the two of them kissing so... Lovingly." He looks so down and out that he's about to make me cry.

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