It's All About You ⌘ Joe Sugg ✓

Chapter 33

Eila's POV

Joe just told me he loved me. He said 'I love you', clear as day on this strangely empty street, across the way from countless closed shops, streetlights our only guide on this dark road.

He said it out of nowhere, and even though I'm drunk I heard it sharply. Even with this warm buzz of alcohol in my veins the words had a paralyzing effect on me.

In a way he voiced my exact feelings - the feelings I've been having since our first date but I was too scared to admit it to myself.

And now that he's said it I did the exact worse thing I could've done.

Nothing.

Maybe he didn't mean it? Surely he is as drunk as I am - I mean we just broke into a bookshop and danced to chasing cars before running away from an old man. I think we can safely say we're pissed.

The silence between us is stifling, and I can't think of anything to do except sing under my breath to ease the awkwardness.

"Let's waste time, chasing cars, around our heads..." I sing softly, kicking the sidewalk with my goddamn high heels. I should never have worn these things, their starting to torture my feet.

"Do you want to go home Eila?" Joe asks kindly, running his hand through his hair for about the 5th time since he said 'it'. He eyes me expectantly, his face looking worried.

I sigh and nod my head slowly, feeling exhaustion wash over me. It has been a long, eventful night. All this dancing and running has taken it's toll. Plus I'm starting to feel a bit nauseous.

Joe rings us a taxi and pretty soon we're inside the soft interior of an all night cab. It feels so good not to be standing and Joe's closeness is comforting as usual. He doesn't seem to be acting like his usual self - probably because of our beyond awkward exchange.

I hope Joe doesn't think I don't love him because of this... Because I think I do, I'm just not ready to voice it yet. I was always taught that I love you is a precious phrase - don't throw it around like nothing. I would rather we say it sober and serious.

Joe's shoulder isn't very comfortable, so I move my head into his lap to find a better position. At first he looks taken aback when I lie down, but soon he starts playing with my hair and I drift off.

The next time I gain conciousness I'm swaying side to side and the only thing I can smell is Joe's aftershave. He's carrying me?? I'm not that much shorter than Joe and quite frankly I'm surprised he managed it.

"Shit..." He stumbles slightly as he navigates the hallway. Hey, I just realised he's drunk as well. I open my eyes fully and tap his arm for him to let me down. He does so reluctantly and I brush myself down.

"Where... Should I sleep?" I say uncertainly, not sure if the invitation to sleep with him is actually open anymore.

He looks at me timidly, his vulnerable side coming out. "You... Can sleep with me if you want." He runs his hand through his hair multiple times, biting his lip as he does.

The action melts my heart and I almost tell him right there that I love him, so much. But I keep my mouth shut.

"That would be perfect." I smile, hands on my hip. Joe nods and smiles shyly before turning to open his apartment.

It doesn't take us long to migrate to his bedroom - the whole apartment is quite stuffy, and neither of us are hungry.

When we get inside Joe's room the stifling silence returns. I don't know what's gotten into us - we've never ever been awkward. I guess Joe really does regret saying that then.