Avengers Imagines (Part One)

Bucky Barnes X Super!Reader - Running Up That Hill: Part 2

A/N - This chapter is a highly requested follow on to another, which is based on the song 'Running up that Hill' by Kate Bush. I would recommend that you read that chapter first for this to make sense. I hope you all enjoy it.

T/W - This chapter has mentions of rape, and physical and mental abuse. Please do not read if this is likely to have a negative effect on you.

Your head felt like it was full of cotton wool. Your thoughts had been all muddled for longer than you would care to think about, and now, it was just numbing. You had tried to fight against the tests at first, attempted to hinder the progress as much as you possibly could, but eventually you had been forced into submission. And now, your brain was cotton wool. 

There were still moments of searing clarity, ones that rushed through you and left you panting and breathless as your memories came back in full force. Usually, it was Bucky. And it was almost always completely mundane. Him kissing your temple as he handed you your morning coffee. You holding him when he'd woken from a particularly bad nightmare. The first day you had met him, both of you far too broken to be so surrounded by other people the way you were; the comforting hand you had placed on his elbow when he had looked so terrified of the others. And then bam, back to blissful numbness. 

You weren't exactly certain of how long it had been since you had decided to take his place. Long enough that they had broken you. Long enough that your hair had become a tangled birds nest. Long enough that your captors had become familiar enough, you could recognise them now, could think of all the things Bucky would do to them when he finally found you.

"He'll kill you all when he comes back," you had murmured, your head lolling around on your neck like one of those bobble-headed toys that you had always found so entertaining. But, you didn't quite have the strength to lift your head fully, so this would have to do, no matter how odd and unthreatening it may have appeared. "He'll tear you all apart," you added, a smirk pulling at your lips as your eyes fluttered closed.

A hand clasping at your jaw caused you to jolt back into consciousness, your eyes finding one of the regular doctors grinning down at you. His grip tightened, holding your head upright for what felt like the first time since you'd come to the facility. "It's been three months since he abandoned you to us, what makes you think he's ever coming back?" he murmured, his fingered digging into your skin as he grinned down at you. "Your precious soldier has forgotten you, child. It's about time you started playing nice." 

The first sob broke out of your throat like a roar, scratching its way free until your entire body shook with the force of it. Bucky wouldn't do that. Or at least, you had always assumed that he wouldn't. He loved you, and he would never just leave you to your fate. And then, with your eyes filled with tears, something clicked in you. He had always been terrified of Hydra, and no matter how much he loved you, walking back into their midst wasn't something he would ever do willingly. 

A second sob followed the first, wet and hacking at it wrangled out of you. "No," you yelped, your voice breaking with the word. "No," you repeated as the doctor released you, his grin spreading. "He's coming," you went on, your entire body writhing against the restraints. 

When you were young, a show of emotion like this one would have levelled cities to the ground. But now, with the power negating collar fixed around your neck, you would have to suffer on your own. 

"He's coming," you told them again, your nails digging into the arm of the chair you were in. The chair you hadn't left in three months, according to the doctor. 

"Don't wear yourself out, My Sweet," the doctor murmured, still staring down at you with that shit-eating grin plastered on his lips. "You'll need all of your energy for the next test," he continued, patting your shaking hand before moving away from you.