17

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by CarmenKB

by CarmenKB

3:06am

I bit my wrist violently as I suppressed my cries. My parents had gotten home a few hours after Minho left. He offered to stay the night again, but I told him I would just see him tomorrow.

That was a fucking mistake.

Here I was now, fear implanted in my chest as I cried alone in my dark room. I was too fucking scared to sleep. I wasn't sure why; maybe it was the constant nightmares I had. I wasn't usually scared of my nightmares; they happened frequently. I don't know what the difference was tonight.

"Okay Jisung, breathe," I whisper to myself, taking in deep breaths to control my tears. "Let's just go to sleep, even though it's a clear waste of time. You don't want to pass out during history again."

I shakily stand from my desk chair, walking over and crawling onto my bed. My head pounded as I laid down, closing my eyes.

Monday. Disgusting. I woke up from my alarm, wanting to throw the horrible machine away.

Hurriedly, I jumped out of bed to grab the clothes I'd set out previously and slipped out of my pajamas. After tripping over my jeans, I finally pulled on a white t-shirt with a faded black sweatshirt over it.

Rushing down the stairs, a lovely scent erupts in my nose and I looked towards the kitchen.

"Hey mom," I say, walking up behind her and kissing her cheek before grabbing a water from the fridge.

"I made eggs and bacon, baby. Are you going to eat or skip out on me like Friday?" She smiled teasingly, flicking my shoulder lightly.

"I'll eat with you today. I missed you. Oh, a friend came over. I forgot to tell you," I say, remembering Minho and the date, though I wasn't going to mention that.

I hadn't even come out, yet.

"That's fine. Who was it?"

"A guy from my math class. Lee Minho," I say, taking out two plates and setting them on the counter.

"Okay, just make sure to tell me next time. I'm really sorry about leaving you here all weekend, and how I sounded on the phone. Your dad just knows how to piss me off," she rolls her eyes.

"It's okay," I say, understanding how much of an asshole my dad can be. I love him, but he's a big fucking dick sometimes. Luckily he left the night before although they had just barely gotten home.

"Anyway, eat up and get your ass to school," she says, dumping eggs and pieces of bacon on my plate before kissing the side of my head and arranging her own plate.

I finished quickly, hugging her before leaving. Of course, as I was walking down the sidewalk to the school, Changbin caught up with me.

"Did you listen to Chan's new soundtrack?" He questions, a bit of a skip in his walk.

"Yeah, it sounds nice," I respond, glancing at him. "I really like the fading stuff. The beat was good, too. He hasn't made something like that before."

"Yeah, we were talking about having a 3racha session at Chan's house later in the week. You up for it?" He questions.

"Yeah," I say, the school coming into view, "it's not like I have anything better to do than hang out with you losers."

"Shut up, squirrel. You love us."

"Correction: I love Chan. You're just... there," I grimace and he gets that looks where he's all offended.

"Yah! That's rude. Be respectful to me, I'm older," he says, punching my shoulder.

"Okay okay, pig gone wild," I laugh, watching him scoff and cross his arms while pouting. "You're right, I do love you guys. Stop fucking pouting, you baby."

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•Early update because why not•