Less talking | Maneskin |

Deal with it

I thanked myself for chosing a bnb not that far from the house. I didn't want to burden the driver with my drama. I have a strong belief that even though sometimes talking to a stranger may be just what you need, it's never a good idea to pour your negative emotions on to someone else. So, there was silence the whole ride, but even if I tried to make a small talk, I wouldn't be able to. Hell, I had to gather myself really hard to thank him and say goodbye when we reached our stop. I pulled my baggage inside and locked the door behind me. All my strength ended there. 

It was only when I stood there, looking at all of my stuff packed, sitting on the floor in a rented place, that the reality hit me. My eyes immediately got watery and I completely fell apart. "Go already!" his final words repeated over and over in my head. The way he chose to say goodbye to me both hurt and infuriated me. Even through all the betrayal I still believed he had some kind of feelings for me. That it wasn't all fake. But if you loved someone, you could never be so cold to them. All I wanted was to say goodbye like an adult. To suck up my hurt feelings and out of respect for each other, leave on a cordial note. I guess he had a different idea.

I couldn't even force myself to go brush my teeth. I took off my pants and sweater and fell into the bed. I was so thankful that I cried so much today, because it helped me fall asleep pretty fast. God knows what I would have done otherwise. I woke up quite early in the morning, but as soon as I realised last night's nightmare happened in real life, I immediately wanted to go back to sleep. I checked my phone, still naively expecting to see a missed call or a text that said "I'm sorry" but there was nothing. I never felt so abandoned in my life. 

I called my parents, since I forgot to text them I landed safely. I could hear my mother was worried about me, but I didn't even have the capacity to act like I'm fine. I lied that my stomach was still upset. That's what I hated about being with him. I had to lie a lot. And when you lie to others, others lie to you. I learned it the hard way. When we finished talking, my phone immediately started ringing again, showing Saffron's name on the screen. I didn't feel like talking to her, but I knew she must beworried, so I took a deep breath and pressed the green button.
— Hey... - at least she wasn't so explosively energetic this time.
— Hi, - I responded, turning to the side.
— How are you holding up?
— Well, I impulsively quit my job, jumped on the plane, went to my former workplace, gathered all my belongings, had a fight with my ex boyfriend that cheated on me with his wife, which he fed me lies about divorcing and now I can barely see the apartment I rented, because my eyes are swollen from all the crying, so you know, - I blurted it all out quickly, so I wouldn't have to slowly tell her the whole story.
— Wait, you're back in Milan?
— Yes.
— And you quit your job... So what are you planning to do? - it sounded like she was carefully writing down everything I say.
— Right now I haveno energy to do anything, so I'll just lay in bed until I feel like tackling everything else, - I yawned.
— Where are you staying now?
— I rented a bnb.
— I need more precise info, please.
— What are you, a doctor? - I chuckled.
— Come stay with me, - she ignored my jokes.
— Thank you for invitation, but I think I'll pass.
— It's not an invitation, it's an order, - she sighed, - Look, I know what you're going thrugh and I don't want you to be completely alone. 
— Saf...
— Let me finish. I won't force you to spend time with me or anything. I will give you your own room where you can be in peace, it just... It will make me feel better knowing I can take care of you.
— You're really sweet, but I will manage by myself, - I really didn't have it in me to get on another flight.
— I know, you don't want to burden me, but listen when I say, You will only burden me if you won't come, because I will constantly have to worry about you. You know I won't have it any other way.
— Let me think about it, okay? - I sighed.
— Can you send me your adress, so I can at least know where to find you if...
— Relax, I'm not going to do anything stupid, - I rolled my eyes at her implication.
— I just need it to be sure.
— Fine, I'll send you.
— Thank you. I won't bother you anymore then, call me if you need anything.
— Okay, I love you, Saf, - I didn't expect it to hurt so much when I said those three words.

*ETHAN'S POV*

I jumped out of bed when I saw Isla's text. Sky quit her job yesterday night and flew here to pack her stuff. I knew she will be upset about the news and I hated that I couldn't talk to her about it. Isla was very strict with her instructions on how to handle this crisis and it meant all of us had to stay silent until the article gets taken down. I didn't expect it to lead to her leaving. Then it dawned on me that Damiano must have been at the house last night because he can't stand his apartment. I quickly dialed his number but he didn't answer. I tried calling Sky too, but she didn't pick up either. 

I threw some clothes on and grabbed my car keys on the way out. I had to go check on them and the only place I could find them was the house. I stopped at every possible traffic light on my way, as they kept on turning red in front of me. Eventually I managed to pull into our driveway. There was no sign of life inside, but it didn't mean anything as it was a morning still. I prayed to find them in each other's arms, despite of what feelings it would give me. I unlocked the door and went inside. 

Immediately, the smell of alcohol hit me and I knew it probably won't be good. I almost stepped on a broken glass shards in the kitchen. there were a few drops of blood near too.
— Damiano! - my heart started beating faster. Lack of answer didn't help me too. I bolted up the stairs to his room. I barged in and saw him laying on his stomach in the bed. His hand was hanging off the edge, his hair was messy and he was only wearing his swimming shorts. There was a little puddle of blood below where his foot was hanging off too. I was relieved to see that the injury wasn't that bad.
— Hey, Damiano, wake up, - I started shaking his shoulders.
— Hhmmph? - he lifted his head up, looking like a total mess.
— How much did you drink last night? - I asked rethorically, seeing he was still very intoxicated.
— Come on, sit, let me look at your foot, - I dragged him up and leaned against the headboard like a ragdoll. I quickly ran to the bathroom to het some cotton pads and hydrogen peroxide. 
— Aah! - he frowned, when I started cleaning the wound.
— Suck it up or you'll get an infection, - I said, carefully inspecting it to see if there are any shards stuck inside.
— It doesn't hurt as much as she did... - he started slurring.
— I know, I know, - I put some more peroxide on, making him wince again.
— S-she left, just left! - I saw tears start streaming down his cheeks. It broke my heart seeing him in this state, but at the same time I couldn't stop thinking about Sky and what she's going through right now.
— Looks like the cut is not that deep and nothing's stuck inside, you're lucky, - I stood up, cleaning blood from my hand.
— Come on now, - I put his hand over my shoulder and started lifting him up on his feet, - Don't step on your right leg fully, be careful, - I caught his leg mid air.
— I don't want to goo... - he whined.
— I know, but we need to get you out of this state, - I said, almost carrying him to the bathroom. 
— Ooh, are we having fun right now? - he chuckled annoyingly, when I pulled off his swimming shorts.
— Uh-huh, you wish. Get in, - I pushed him in the shower and turned lukewarm water on.
— Stop! - he didn't like it, but I knew it was going to help tremendously.

The water cleared his mind, making him look like a human again. He was even able to dress himself. I cleaned the blood off the floor while he was doing it and changed his sheets. 
— No! - he ran out of bathroom, limping, - Don't touch the sheets, she put them on for me!
— They're dirty, bro, - I finished putting a fresh cover on is pillow, - So what happened yesterday?
— She came here and I tried to talk to her... and she wouldn't listen to me... and then we had an arguement and s-she left! - he was struggling to stand, - Why did she leave? Why does it always happen to me?! - he was in tears again and I couldn't bear it.
— Try to calm down, bro, - I hield him by his shoulders.
— I- I love her, but I hate... She's just like her, you know... - I couldn't fully understand what he was talking about, but I saw him getting agitated again, so I laid him on the bed, trying to calm down.
— Do you know where she is now? - I asked, once he pulled himself together.

*SKY'S POV*

I laid in bed until afternoon, scrolling through social media and consuming meaningless "Youtube" videos for hours. It helped me escape my reality a little. I didn't know what to do with myself. It truly felt like I had no purpose at this moment. No steps planned ahead. It drove me crazy, seeing my luggage in the same spot by the door unpacked. well, I didn't feel like unpacking, because not even I knew what I will decide to do next. I turned on some kind of murder mystery video and it was really captivating. It was coming to a culmination when the doorbell rang, startling me so hard I felt like I jumped to the ceiling.