chapter 46

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“Thank you

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“Thank you.  Thank you for helping me ………..for helping me get Edward to the hospital….” She trailed off, uncertain what to say next.

“Edward….your husband?” Tae said, bitterness creeping in despite his best efforts.

She ducked her head, face flooded with shame, unable to meet his gaze.

“How is he?” Tae asked, his rich voice taking on the tone of interrogation he had honed over the years. 

He watched her shoulders shake at the question.  He cursed himself. He had intended to keep his cool, hide his feelings, but he knew that was useless.  He knew she could feel his emotions as deeply as he felt hers, but he was unable to maintain “nice" right now.

She was silent for several minutes, struggling, he could tell, with what to say next.

Finally, she drew a shuddering breath and raised her tear stained face to his.

“He died,” she said.  Her voice was so soft, the statement so unexpected that he sat there stunned.

Seeing his face, knowing he was struggling to comprehend, she went on.

“He….he was very sick when he went to the hospital.  We knew that.  He refused to go until that day he asked me to bring help.  I think he knew.  I think he did not want me there alone with him when he died,” she explained.

Tae was reeling.  He thought back to the billing statement he had gotten a week after he had walked out of the hospital.  He had only looked at the dates and the amounts.  There was no other information there.  He had assumed that the man had recovered and had been discharged home.  But he had died. 

He moved closer to her, hurting for her, while his own feelings were still tender.  He was so damned confused.

“Wait…when?  I am so sorry, “he was stumbling over himself trying to get his thoughts in order.

“Three days after we went in.  He was at peace.  He had made arrangements for his memorial and I followed his wishes,” she said, her tone almost emotionless, like she was telling someone else’s story.

“Three days?  That is over a month ago….” He left the statement hanging.  She had been on her own a month, widowed and mourning.  Is that why she had been hungry?  He thought back to the tiny room she had stayed in.  Was she still living there?

She saw the questions firing in his mind and nodded.

“The memorial was immediate.  Then I went back to our rooms and I mourned for 30 days.  I paid my respects to him and honored what he did for me,” she paused, then pushed ahead.

“Now, I must go.  But I knew I could not leave without explaining things to you.  I do not want you to think I misled you.  I don’t want you to hhhate me.” At that her voice betrayed her, breaking at last, and she brushed tears from her eyes.

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