Choose Me- the second novel

Chapter 80- implications

***Taylors POV***

We wake up in the morning, together. The rest of the week passed quickly and now I just feel ready for a break. I feel groggy and tired. Matty comforts me rubbing my arms and tummy smiling. He asks me what I would like for breakfast and I tell him I want eggs and toast. He smiles and says it will be ready when I go downstairs. I kiss him passionately and place my hand on top of his over my belly.
"You feeling okay today?" He asks.

"Mhmm" I tell him.
"Feels heavy down there, like everything's been growing. I dunno I can't explain it" I say

I lay onto my back and push the covers off slightly I stare at my tummy.
"Maybe we should start measuring it" I suggest.
I look over at him, he's laying on his side. His eyes gleaming and I can't help but to kiss him.

"It's been growing, I can tell" he smiles.
He gets out his phone and searches up something.

"At 4- 5 weeks main symptoms are possible sickness and fatigue. It mentions prenatal vitamins. I bought you one by the way it's downstairs." He says kissing me.

"You went out to get vitamins" I smile at him.

"Of course I saw how tired you were and thought it might help" he says.

"Thank you Matty" I say smiling.

I have a shower and get changed into my skinny trousers and one of my new leotards. I go downstairs and as promised eggs and toast are on the table ready.
I eat it all and once I'm finished I feel decidedly sick.

I run upstairs and much to my own disgust throw everything back up. I go over to the sink and brush my teeth again. I wipe my face and reapply my lipstick. I put on some perfume.

Matty is alarmed when I tell him. He asks if I want to eat something else, I refuse as I'm feeling sick still but I put some cereal bars in my bag to keep him happy.
He drives a touch slower to uni, so as not to jolt me around. He kisses me when we're out the car and tells me I look radiant.
"Have you got any mints, I'm craving mint." I laugh.

He reopens the car and grabs a pack from in the glove compartment. I smile up at him and take the pack.
"It will make me feel less sick" I say.
He smiles down at me and kisses me goodbye. I head off to psychology. It's Friday today and I can't wait to just spend the weekend with Matty.

When I head in Ross hasn't arrived yet and Jay is in his seat next to me. I scan around for Jane.
She's at the front and my heart sinks.
I go and sit wordlessly next to Jay. I pull my stuff out feeling his eyes on me.
"Thought anymore about the kitchen counter" he smirks.

I face him, staring at him.
"Have you?" I ask.
"I'm sure it's hard to see it every day and not think about what I told you I wanted" I laugh.

"I think about it and other things almost all the time" he says and winks.

"What with Jane?" I ask quietly.

"No, not with Jane" he says.
"She has no interest in the kitchen counter" he laughs.

"What's happened? Did you suggest it and then she ran to the hills" I ask

"No not quite. Wow now I'm really getting mixed messages here today. One minute you're touching me and telling me you want to be bent over my kitchen counter and the next you're throwing it in my face" he says

"Are you still with her?" I ask

"No" he says and watches me.

"Well why not ?" I ask

"Because I've moved on" he says.
He eyes my shocked expression and then retaliates.
"Is that such a crime?" He adds.

"I'm not answering that" I say and thankfully Ross arrives sitting on my other side.

"Morning. You two at it again?" He laughs.

"Morning Ross." I laugh.

The lecture starts thankfully and I relax forgetting all about Jay. He eyes me a couple times and I look resolutely at the front. I don't want to look at him, he's getting on my nerves once again. Ross moves next to me and places his hand on mine. He strokes over my arm and I relax. I almost close my eyes. Since the pregnancy I've been more in tune with my caring side amongst other things. And I can't seem to help the way that I comes across to Ross. He cares for me so thoroughly. And I feel like I show him too much love which leads him into believing we're going to be something more. I need to start pushing him away.  Gently.

The lecture finishes and I get ready to leave. I grab all of my things and pack them away. I'm feeling just slightly sick so I pop a mint in my mouth. I'm so hungry it's unreal but now I'm worried to eat in case I'm sick again. We all walk out together and head to the canteen. I start worrying how I'm going to eat anything and not run off to the toilets.

Once we're inside Matty isn't here yet and I feel more worried. I walk around and grab a tray of food for both of us. I pay and then set it down and wait for him. Ross is sitting eating pasta and Jay is opposite me drinking coffee.
"Not gonna eat anything, Tay?" He asks me smiling.

"Do you have to comment on everything I do and don't do?" I say.

He laughs.
"What can I say you fascinate me" he smiles.

"That's great, you infuriate me" I say. Ross snorts trying to conceal his laughter.

"Incoming Jay, she looks pissed" Ross says smirking.

I glance over to see Jane heading directly for us.

"Jay, how fucking dare you. You inconsiderate piece of shit." She shouts and she's angry. He falters. For some a reason I don't really quite understand myself I stand up for him. I decide to diffuse the situation. Or at least try too.

I stand up just behind Jane. I lightly tap her arm to get her attention.
"Jane I'm sorry I know you're pissed.." I begin.
Not a wise idea. I shouldn't have gotten myself involved at all. She was clearly in fight or flight mode and she had to take that out on me who was stupid enough to stand behind her. She shoves me back. She turns to me feeling embarrassed, and alls I can think is man she is strong. And she's just hit me. I worry instantly. I kick myself mentally for being so stupid and exposing myself and my waist.

Matty is suddenly there and I look at him, pleading him not to worry or make a scene. He looks seriously pissed.
"What the actual fuck" he says scraping his hair back.

"I didn't realise it was her" she stutters
"Really I heard what you lot were saying though anyways so you kinda deserved it you bitch" she says.

I cry, not really because of her. But because she just shoved me, I'm so shocked. What does this mean? It was quite a shove. Surely it can't have affected anything? I feel like I'm going to throw up.

Matty instantly walks me away and outside. Leaving my bag, the food everything. When we're outside he sits me down on a bench and it's cold and I shiver. Trying to hold myself together. I feel like a sniffly child who just got herself into a scrap.

"Are you okay, what do you feel like?" He asks me looking into my eyes.

"I'm okay Matty, I shouldn't have stood up for him I just felt like she was being a total bitch. She just makes me so angry you know" I say and cry again.

He gets his phone and Google's the implications of being shoved whilst pregnant at 5 weeks. This is not happening to me, I tell myself.

"Any pain or discomfort or new symptoms?" He says and he sounds like doctor Matty.

"No pain, I just feel sick still" I say.

He breathes out a sigh of relief mixed with frustration.

"Fuck" he says and shoves his phone in his pocket.

"Let's go to the clinic and check?" He half asks.

"Yes" I manage.
"My bag?" I say.
"I left it in the canteen" I add.

"I'll go get it stay here" he says.
He bends down and kisses me. He brushes my face with his hands and walks off.