Choose Me- the second novel

Chapter 91- sorry

***Matty's POV***

I gaze down at my world. Sleeping with me. She looks tense in her sleep no doubt because of all that she's been through.

I was so shocked and I just pleaded that she would be okay. I understand that miscarriage is a reality for many couples that get pregnant. And I accept that this time and on this occasion no matter how much we both wanted this it wasn't meant to be. I'm gutted absolutely.

But over everything I need to be there for her. For the women that I love. I will take her to the clinic in the next couple of days. I've read the procedure booklet and I will pamper her afterwards to help her feel a little bit better.

I imagined our life with a child, how much love we would have been able to give that little tiny human. And no matter how upsetting, that is for me. It's worse for her because she held that life inside of her. She felt it grow even for a short time. She went through the motions.

She feels bad and it breaks my heart. It's not her fault and I need to hammer that home. She did everything perfectly and sometimes fate just has a wicked way of ruining things for you.

She's told me that she wants to go to university tomorrow she has a test and I respect that. I think being busy might actually be a good thing.

She stirs and I pull her into me again, kissing her forehead.
"Matty" she says.

"Yes babe" I say.

She sobs and I hold her close.

"I need to get it all out. All of the crying so I can focus on moving forwards" she says and that makes sense to me.

"I understand" I tell her.

We cry each other to sleep.

***Taylors POV***

I wake up so tired and over emotional. I feel for Matty and hug him tightly into me. I focus hard on not crying. I can't go into university crying.

"Good morning" he says.

"Good morning my love" I say and kiss him. He kisses me back wholeheartedly.

Eventually I leave the bed and head downstairs. I grab him a coffee and me a tea and some toast and then I take it upstairs.

He smiles when I enter the room and thanks me. We try and keep the morning rolling and busy so that we don't have to think about the tragedy.
I notice the bleeding has eased off a lot. So I wear a pad and put a few in my bag. I brush my hair out loose and put on a bit of makeup under my eye to take away the puffiness and redness. I shower myself in perfume and head downstairs ready to go.

He's rolled two cigarettes up and we smoke in the car as he's driving.
When we arrive he parks up and we sit for a minute.
"If this gets too much just text me I will come and get you straight away" he says looking over at me.
"I'll meet you after psychology and we can have lunch together" he adds.

I smile "I love you babe" I say.
I kiss him for a prolonged amount of time and then we get out of the car and I walk up to psychology determined to see through the day.

When I arrive I sit down next to Jay, Ross isn't here just yet.
"Hey babe" he says.
I look over him and start to feel slightly normal again. Like I can just be Taylor. Not Taylor who is in complete and utter turmoil. The Taylor that can have a joke and throw shade at her friend.