She led me to him (Werewolf story)

Chapter 71: An other reason to disagree

Jayson POV

The white liquid getting tainted by pink, green and yellow, my fingers playing with the spoon so art could spray on the milk with my cereals.
My grip hardened on the cutlery with shame.

"Jay. Don't ever come to me with a fork in hand, it's sickening."

Her words hurt like burning iron marking my flesh. The only wound I wanted to make on her was my teeth sinking in her shoulder to claim her as mine.
But how much did I hurt her, how many of these wounds was she hiding from me.

I dropped the spoon, making it rang with the porcelain bowl. With a bit more strength, the container would have exploded.
I did not regret containing my anger.

"Alpha Rider, would you mind if I join you."

My view moved away from my food art to take a look over the empty kitchen.

"Kamil, when it's the two of us, Jay would be enough."

I went back to my spoon and my now monochrome milk.
His tray bumped mine, making small waves into my boring bowl. And it was all it took one drop reaching my shirt.

"Be careful with how you act."

My guard did not waver at my surfacing anger, he dug into his plate without sparing me a glance. With his fork and knife, he neatly cut the ham in small pieces.

"Did Serah tell you?"

I asked with nothing but a churning stomach.
His eyes unfocused, to meet mine but I could see he had no idea what I talked about.

"Did she tell you about her fear of forks?"

Comprehension dwelled into his being and resumed eating his proteins.

"You mean her trauma."

Volker and I winced at the gravity of our marks.

"She did not, but we spent enough time together for me to witness one of her attacks."

My heart did nothing but break in Ice Moon. As if the goddess herself was pointing out how undeserving of a mate I was.
Did I have a way out? Were we really meant to be or did I blew everything away.

"Don't torture yourself with that. She can manage herself. What she cannot forgive you about was your shitty behavior before she left, and how you did not miss a beat to defend your ex."

In the first half I was about to beg him to put the blame on me but he had the right words to drench me with guilt.
My body was numb to the accusations, I did defend Dina over her, I didn't even try to believe her and the cherry on top, I slapped her.
There was no getting out.
Even if I felt her waver at Kamil's mom's, could I be shameless enough to pursue her.

"Do you think she could ever forgive me?"

My face went down accepting my wrong decisions, the milk became dirty green, toned down by the milk, thus both the pink and yellow had been swallowed in that battle.

"If she was a mere human, I would advise you to give up but lately her lycan side is slowly taking over and I promise you, her instinct will always bring her back to you."

For the first time in this conversation, his words were more attractive than my half finished cereals.

"You know her right, what do you think I can do?"

He grimaced, it wasn't looking good for me.
His food were left alone as he tried to find me a good approach. To be honest, only a miracle could get me through this hardship.

"Nothing, she blames you and you coming back would be not respecting her boundaries. The only possible solution would be to simply give her space, and focus merely on yourself, let her see what a good person you are."