Y/N - your name
C/N - crush's name
Song: "Fairytale" - Alexander Rybak
requested by @yesididmakethis
⚠️unaccepting parents of homosexuality⚠️
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« Years ago
When I was younger
I kinda liked
A girl I knew »
C/N is a name I will never be able to forget: it's burned into my memory, just like her face is burned into my retinas. Of course, when you are both merely fourteen year old teenagers raised by conservative Christian parents, you have to keep your feelings hidden. The worst part is my parents still had their suspicions, so I had to act like I hated C/N and wanted nothing to do with her, which was so far from the truth.
« She was mine and we were sweethearts
That was then, but then it's true »
We were resorted to dating in secret; passing messages in class and hiding underneath the bleachers at break and lunch. Not even our other friends could know we associated with each other, as that risked the information getting back to our parents.
But that was ten years ago, and we are both older now, although we haven't seen one another in the past decade. She is the reason I came back to visit my hometown; I want to find her. Just as long as my parents don't know I am here, because I haven't spoken to them in six years and am strictly no contact with them.
« I'm in love with a fairytale
Even though it hurts »
Fourteen year old me went to no ends to retain the unstable relationship I had with C/N. It was unstable both because of our parents, and also because we were stupid teenagers in love. We didn't know how to act or what to do, but we would probably have figured that out if our parents had allowed us to be an openly gay couple. That element was the part that caused it to crash and burn.
« Caus I don't care if I lose my mind
I'm already cursed »
However, we are adults now, no longer tied down by our parents. So that's why I have finally decided to search for her, not necessarily to revisit our relationship, but maybe to at least get the closure we never did. It's ridiculous that I consider myself to be in love still with a teenage flame, but so was the situation we were put in.
« Every day we started fighting
Every night we fell in love »
The facade we kept up during the day sometimes cut deeper than we let on; insults hurled at each other, backhanded compliments given generously. Yes, it was all an act, but sometimes it felt real. That was until the night time came, when we would sneak out of our houses and meet in the park. All the apparent hatred from when the sun was up would dissipate, and we would hold each other and mutter sweet nothings to one another like our lives depended on it. I think partially they did.
« No one else could make me sadder
But no one else could lift me high above »
C/N's fake insults cut deeper than any real ones from anyone else. But her kisses healed the wounds like they never even existed. It was confusing for a fourteen year old to be on such an emotional rollercoaster all day every day.
When I find her I will probably be overwhelmed with emotions, but for now I am stuck selecting the baked good I want from my hometown's bakery. Maybe a cinnamon roll? I remember C/N always loved cinnamon rolls.
« I don't know what I was doing
When suddenly we fell apart »
I still remember the day her parents found out about us. We didn't know what we were doing and became too careless; leaving my jumper in her room by accident. C/N's parents freaked out more than we could ever have imagined and quickly packed up her suitcases and sent her to a Catholic boarding school. All her methods of communication were cut off and I haven't heard from her since.
We never officially broke up, so I guess you could say it's been a long relationship.
« Nowadays
I cannot find her
But when I do
We'll get a brand new start »
Our parents can't control us anymore, though. We are fully grown up and can enter relationships of our own accord without the need for secrecy. I pray that C/N has not been brainwashed into heteronormativity, and is no longer talking to her parents. But the truth is I do not know what became of her, so I am trying to find out.
« I'm in love with a fairytale
Even though it hurts
Caus I don't care if I lose my mind
I'm already cursed »
Our stupid childhood fairytale. Really, sometimes I do wonder what we were thinking.
We used to believe we would secretly stay together through school and save up money to move far away the second we graduated. Our wedding would be gorgeous and we would have a lovely little home full of everything special to us. It would be our safe haven.
That was just a child's dream, though. The real world doesn't favour people like that.
« She's a fairytale, yeah
Even though it hurts »
"One cinnamon roll please," a voice from beside me speaks to the baker. I'm still looking down at the display as I briefly relive my memories, but as I see the baker take a cinnamon roll from in front of me I remember it's polite to give my fellow customer a small smile.
That gorgeous hair. Those sharp but majestic eyes. That breathtaking complexion. Her fairytale-like appearance is unmistakeable, even though she is visibly more matured than from back then.
« Caus I don't care if I lose my mind
I'm already cursed »
"Y/N?" she says gently, as if afraid to speak loudly.
I nod, "C/N..." The tears pricking at my eyes are hot against my cold skin.
"I can't believe it's you..." she speaks with a cracking voice, tears pouring down her face in waterfalls already. I find myself quickly crying just as much as we pull each other into a tight hug.
"After all these years," I say, cupping her face, "Where do I even begin?"
C/N smiles, "How about with a cinnamon roll and coffee?"
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sorry this took so long! i have been unexpectedly busy :)
[1075 words]
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Crush Oneshots | Crush x Reader
Fanfiction- no smut - crush x reader - my writing improves throughout :) - NO LONGER UPDATED -------- ☘︎ european date format ☘︎︎ started: 15/02/2020 finished: 15/05/2022 milestones: -10k reads on 03/06/2020 -1k votes on 28/07/2020 -2k votes on 30/10/2...
