Crush Oneshots | Crush x Reader

[𝟭𝟬𝟰] ⚠️ Nᴏ Mᴀᴛᴛᴇʀ Wʜᴀᴛ - ℝ𝔼ℚ𝕌𝔼𝕊𝕋

Y/N - your name
C/N - crush's name
B/N - best friend's name

Song: "Good Girls (Don't Get Used)" - Beach Bunny

⚠️YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL! FAT IS BEAUTIFUL! the plot is simply that the reader does not like the fact they are chubby, as requested by isla092507 ⚠️ if this topic is a sensitive one for you, don't read this chapter! :)

some jokes in this are courtesy of james acaster <3

————————

"So, Y/N, what did you get up to over the weekend?" my best friend, B/N, asked me. We were sat with our group of friends around a canteen table, enjoying our lunches.

"My cousin threw a surprise party for her wife, we jumped out at her when she arrived."

"Cool-"

"I argued it would be more surprising if we just stood there in the dark staring in silence... they didn't like that suggestion."

I heard chuckles ripple throughout the group. Biting my lip, I glanced down at my uneaten food: it looked so good... so mouth-watering... but I'm chubby enough as it is. Maybe just a couple bites?

What I didn't realise was that C/N, my crush, saw me look down at my food; he saw the conflict flashing over my eyes. I also didn't know that he had had suspicions for a while. Why would I have? It was perfectly normal for me to dress in baggy hoodies and loose-fitting trousers, so I had no reason to believe anyone would suspect anything. Plus, I had ate less of my lunch as a gradual process, taking care so no one would notice. It's not like it mattered anyway, I hadn't lost any weight at all.

The chuckles died down, and someone else in the group began talking, as I felt C/N's gaze pin on to me. I smiled warmly at him, trying to hide the pain in my heart I felt when looking at his face. Someone as perfect as him could never like me, not when I'm so fat. Just when he looked like he was about to say something, the bell rang, relieving me of the anxiety of his potential words. "You're fat." "You're ugly." "How could anyone love you?" I shook my head: C/N would never think or say those things, but he also would never be attracted to me either.

I picked up my bag and began walking to my form room, which I unfortunately didn't have any friends in. While doing so, I couldn't help but play with the hem of my hoodie, fearing what was so desperately hidden underneath. My dreaded permanent tummy rolls.

What do I have last?

Oh no.

Oh fuck.

Oh God.

Physical education.

And our class is going to start ballroom dancing with the boys.

If anyone had been watching me walk down the corridor, I guarantee they would have seen my face pale. But there was no avoiding PE. God knows I had used up all of the excuses to get out of it, and now, when I need them the most, I don't have them?

Changing was exactly as bad as I had imagined it to be. B/N chatted animatedly the entire time we were changing; I've always liked how she doesn't feel the need to even notice a person's weight. The bitchy girls in my class aren't like that. I could practically feel their glances and giggles of mockery from all the way across the room. It's okay. I told myself. You have joggers and a jumper for a reason.

Breathing deeply, I finished tying the laces of my trainers and followed B/N into the gymnasium. As I walked in, my eyes locked on to the one boy that simultaneously made my heart flutter and insecurities grow. The more I like him, the more I dislike myself. C/N smiled at me, and I tried to genuinely grin back, but I guess my expression still held evidence of the sadness the bitchy girls caused, because he frowned. That frown was enough to break me, to push me over the edge.

My chest tightened.

Tears pricked at my eyes.

My breathing shallowed.

And I ran out of the gym, back to the now-empty girls' changing rooms.

I didn't think he'd follow me and find me curled up in the corner crying uncontrollably, but I guess he had gotten permission from the teacher as they knew we were friends. "Hey... Y/N..." he spoke softly, as if he feared his voice alone could make me shatter to pieces. That wasn't far from the truth.

"I'm unlovable," I said without thinking, "Useless. Fat. Ugly."

"Huh?" he blanked, delicately placing a hand on my shoulder as he crouched down beside me.

"You heard me."

"You aren't useless. God knows you're the reason our entire friend group laughs," he began, making me slowly peer up into his eyes, "And why do you see fat as a bad thing? Who said that fat isn't beautiful? I'll beat them up, I swear!"

I cracked a small smile.

"And also, you are the most gorgeous person I have ever laid my eyes on. I guess I've figured you haven't been feeling great for a while... and the reason I noticed is because, well, I pay attention to you- a lot-"

"Huh?" it was my turn to blank.

"I like you, Y/N," he said firmly, "And I will no matter what the scale says."

"You really mean that?"

He nodded.

"I- I like you, too."

C/N's perfect face stretched into a grin, and he stood up with an extended hand, "Come on, I think you need something to cheer you up."

"What do you have in mind?"

"Just trust me."

————————

ahhh! i hope this was alright!

also~ the spotify rewind came out~

istg my top 2020 songs playlist is a piece of art, ily spotify <3

and my favourite band (beach bunny) released a new song which is the one at the top ^

they also announced their EP for january!!

[1007 words]